28yo female with 80k savings - So I am a 28 year old woman, living in Sydney who has saved almost 80,000k. (I have worked hard for the past 10 years and am now earning well in my career). But I am in a complicated situation with my partner (relationship can be emotionally abusive and toxic) who wants me to get a mortgage for an 800 property that his mum signed him up for 4 years ago when we weren’t together . He has already paid 10% to secure it (80k) and wants me to put the other 80 down for the mortgage. I know this may sound ridiculous but it is a really big challenge for me and I want to make the right decision. Apart of me thinks I should try and get a home myself but my partner tells me I wouldn’t be able to get a loan by myself. He also says that he wouldn’t be able to get a loan without me… I am really worried to make the wrong decision, when I feel like I have the opportunity now to make a good decision for the future.

Any advice or thoughts would be helpful. Reality checks and grounding perspectives welcome.


RESPONSES:

Overwhelmed by the responses here and greatly appreciated.

Many comments suggest I speak to a therapist, mortgage broker, etc which I am planning on doing but in all honesty, these comments are helpful, direct and honest and for the stage I’m at have been a big wake-up call while also helping me gain clarity on my next best steps, both in regards to finance and relationship decisions.

I do acknowledge the fact that some people see it as a no-brainer to simply say no and leave. I wish it were that simple but it’s been a 5 year relationship with lots of good times and a deep connection.

Thanks for your thoughts everyone. 🙏🏻